欢迎光临新诗歌网 http://xinshige.tougao.com/ 张祈年代诗选(1992——2007) http://zhangqibeijing.blog.sohu.com/

哈代:以后

上一篇 / 下一篇  2008-02-21 08:16:06 / 个人分类:名诗新译

查看( 112 ) / 评论( 11 )
以后
  
  原作:哈代
  
  张祈 译
  
  
  在我惶恐的逗留后,现世插上了它的后门,
  五月也扑动着它明丽的绿色树叶的翼翅,
  像新编织的丝绸那样纤细雅致,邻居们是否会问,
  “他那个人从前是否习惯于留意这些事”?
  
  如果那时恰好是黄昏,就像眼睑眨动无声,
  那暮色中的苍鹰穿越阴影来这儿降落,
  停在那被风吹斜的灌木丛上,一个凝视者会想到,
  “对他来说,这一切一定被熟悉地观察过。”
  
  如果我穿行在温暖的,飞蛾嗡鸣的漆黑夜色中,
  当那刺猬正偷偷摸摸地在草坪上前行,也许有人会说,
  “他曾为让这些天真的小生灵不受伤害而努力,
  可是现在他去了,而且他一无所成。”
  
  或者,当人们听说我终于离去,他们站在门边,
  仰望着冬日繁星闪耀的夜空,那些再也
  不会见到我脸庞的人心底是否会升起这样的念头:
  “他这个人能够洞悉这些景象的神秘。”
  
  而当死亡的丧钟在阴暗中为我而鸣,
  一阵微风掠过,将它的轰响暂停,然后又再次响起,
  就像是新的钟声在撞击,是否有谁会说,
  “他现在再也听不到了,可是他真的习惯留意这些事。”



  
Afterwards

THOMAS HARDY


  
  When the present has latched its postern behind my tremulous stay,
  And the may month flaps its glad green leaves like wings,
  Delicate-filmed as new-spun silk , will the neighbours say,
  "He was a man who used to notice such things"?
  
  If it be in the dusk when , like an evelid,s soundless blink,
  The dewfall-hawk comes crossing the shades to alight
  Upon the wind-warped upland thorn , a gazer may think,
  "To him this must have been a familiar sihgt."
  
  If i pass during some nocturnal blackness , mothy and warm,
  When the hedgehog travels furtively over the lawn,
  One may say ,"he strove that such innocent creatures should come to no harm,
  But he could do little for them; and now he is gone."
  
  If when hearing that i have been stilled at last , they stand at the door,
  Watching the full-starred heavens that winter sees,
  Will this thought rise on those who will meet my face to no more,
  "He was one who had an eye for such mysteries."
  
  And will any say when my bell of quittance is heard in the gloom ,
  And a crossing breeze cuts a pause in its outrollings,
  Till they rise again , as they were a new bell,s boom,
  "He hears it not now , but used to notice such things"?

[ 本帖最后由 张祈 于 2008-2-21 08:14 编辑 ]

TAG:

风之桥—李大兴的博客 李大兴 发布于2008-02-21 14:26:25
哈代是我年轻时十分喜欢的作家之一,文字里有很节制的悲伤。
落雪大地的个人空间 落雪大地 发布于2008-02-21 19:34:28
学习一下哈代。
北陵王:阴影移动 北陵王 发布于2008-02-23 22:30:52
只有哈代的诗歌......
才能让我们看到我们自己的生活.
张祈:群峰之上 张祈 发布于2008-02-23 22:46:10
嗯,哈代真的很奇特。
既有抒情的感受,又从来不回避和虚饰现实。
一梦的个人空间 一梦 发布于2008-02-23 23:22:06
我怎么读过一次哈代的诗。印象中不是这个样子呀?
北陵王:阴影移动 北陵王 发布于2008-02-24 11:03:49
哈代,我最喜爱的外国作家......
我读过他几乎所有的小说.但是遗憾的是他的全集至今未能购得.
张祈:群峰之上 张祈 发布于2008-02-24 11:15:35
补上另外二首。
都是旧译。
哈代的诗有的极难译。
戴玨的个人空间 戴玨 发布于2008-02-25 01:26:05
who used to notice such things
从前是否习惯于留意这些事
并不是“習慣於”,who was used to noticing such things才是。

the wind-warped upland thorn完整的意思是
被風吹變了形的高地荊棘

另外英文版本有些小錯誤,這個版本好些:

When the Present has latched its postern behind my tremulous stay,
And the May month flaps its glad green leaves like wings,
Delicate-filmed as new-spun silk, will the neighbours say,
“He was a man who used to notice such things”?

If it be in the dusk when, like an eyelid’s soundless blink,
The dewfall-hawk comes crossing the shades to alight
Upon the wind-warped upland thorn, a gazer may think,
“To him this must have been a familiar sight.”

If I pass during some nocturnal blackness, mothy and warm,
When the hedgehog travels furtively over the lawn,
One may say, “He strove that such innocent creatures should come to no harm,
But he could do little for them; and now he is gone.”

If, when hearing that I have been stilled at last, they stand at the door,
Watching the full-starred heavens that winter sees,
Will this thought rise on those who will meet my face no more,
“He was one who had an eye for such mysteries”?

And will any say when my bell of quittance is heard in the gloom,
And a crossing breeze cuts a pause in its outrollings,
Till they rise again, as they were a new bell’s boom,
“He hears it not now, but used to notice such things?”
李之平的个人空间 李之平 发布于2008-02-25 20:15:36
总觉得刻意了。
拥挤僵化得很。也许用短句更好。
张祈:群峰之上 张祈 发布于2008-02-25 22:29:27
我对句式的选择一般是看原文的长短

QUOTE:

原帖由 李之平 于 2008-2-25 20:15 发表
拥挤僵化得很。也许用短句更好。
这首诗感觉用短句译不出那种回声的感觉。
张祈:群峰之上 张祈 发布于2008-02-25 22:31:08
戴先生看得很细。
我再斟酌。多谢。
我来说两句

(可选)

Open Toolbar